Thursday, June 16, 2016

When she sleep i shall blog

Hello from the land of the midgets, so that's it, i am officially an adult! i mean all you need is a baby to get the title right?
Before i delivered everyone was saying how it's going to be the most beautiful experience and the best day of my life, and in a way it was but mostly it was fucking painful and bloody. I already hate hospitals so spending 4 days in there was enough for me! and the pain, the motherfucking pain.
I had said no epidural from the day i found out i was pregnant, had this fantasy delivery in my head with reggae music and candles and no drugs. Well on the day as soon as they asked me if i wanted an epidural i said fuck yes, 7 hours of pain was enough for me. I took drugs like a junkie on vacation! oh and nobody even mention anything about the pressure! all those baby courses and talks with the midwifes and no one even thought to mention that when its time to push, you gonna feel like you're taking the biggest shit of your life! when her head came out i felt like i was going to split in two! and poor Jonathan, he saw EVERYTHING, i dont think he will ever see my vagina the same way again. and then they gave her to me and that moment i said yes, now its the best day of my life.
Now i am responsible for another human, i have to keep her alive and then get her ready for the world but most importantly i have to love her and tell her that everyday and that's the easiest and best part about being a mom.
I miss you guys like crazy, i think about you everyday and how being your friend has taught me many things and made me a better parent. Over and out for now.